Let me begin by expressing my
gratitude to those of you who've ordered Doppelganger SE and have been
kind enough to share with me how much you've enjoyed the zine. Being
as how it's not only the first time I've ever published a zine, but also
how new and untried the CDzine format is in this fandom, your words of encouragement
and expressions of satisfaction with the finished product are very deeply
appreciated. Thanks a bunch, you guys are great.
Biblio has chosen to publish her stories from the original Jack Daniel Six Packs
1 and 2 and encouraged me to keep mine available to readers by creating a new
anthology of my own stories from each of the CDzines to create a Jack Daniel Six
Pack Reprise. Biblio did stop nagging long enough to create a snazzy new
cover and disc label for the Reprise.
CDZine $12 USD | ebook
download $8 USD
Six Stories by PhoenixE
*A Man Most Unfortunate by
Relationship, Angst, Episode Tag for Point of View
to read an except
Synopsis: A kiss witnessed
through the quantum mirror convinces Daniel he's holding Jack back
from discovering 'true love'. Jack determines to convince him otherwise.
This story won a Sizzler Fan Fiction
Award for the version originally published in 'The Other Side'.
**Unsuspected by PhoenixE
J/D, Angst, Drama, H/C Established Relationship
here to read an except
After Daniel is terribly
injured in an off-world incident Sam learns something astonishing about
the Colonel and the Archaeologist.
Starry Night by PhoenixE
Categories: First Time,
to read an except
Synopsis: A gentle, sensuous,
lightly humorous, slightly irreverent (it is Jack's pov, after all) tale
of the aftermath of near loss resulting in a revelation under the stars.
Keeper by PhoenixE
Categories: First Time, Drama, Angst, Hurt Comfort Post Menace, kind of
a Meridian Alternative
Synopsis: Despair drives Daniel to the edge. Can Jack keep him from
taking the final step?
Notes: I actually
started writing this well before Abyss aired but ran up against the proverbial
brick wall. It's been sitting on my hard drive ever since - the story,
that is, not the brick wall - in it's partially completed state, but was
there for me when I needed to come up with a sixth story to round out the zine. Sorry about the substitution but sometimes things happen and
plans must change.
here to read an excerpt
Daniel Ex Machina
J/D, Drama, Established
Relationship, Angst, H/C
, Minor Spoilers for Legacy, Maternal Instinct,
Synopsis: Is Daniel going insane...again?
click here to read an excerpt
Wild Side Series
Missing Link by PhoenixE
J/D, Drama, First Time,
Synopsis: A desperate midnight rescue...
Rating: NC-17 for violence
Primal Directive by PhoenixE
J/D, Drama, First Time,
Minor Spoilers for 'Need'.
Synopsis: Jack's version of the events of 'Missing
click here to read
Other good Stuff:
Antiqua font, 12 point. 244 pages, 80,188 word, 6.4 megs
The cover and some lovely collages
by Biblio, gorgeous manips and story banners by Chance, and yeah, afraid
I've thrown one or two things in there as well. Sorry!
* The 'one star' stories
were originally published in the zine "The Other Side' and appear here
with the kind and gracious permission of it's publisher, Chance.
As the year isn't up yet she really didn't have to let us, but not only
did she say 'go for it' but she' made banners for the stories as well!
It's a great zine, btw, and if you want to find out more drop her
a line at firstname.lastname@example.org
And now: if you haven't already
zipped down and read 'em - the excepts...
A MAN MOST
Where is he, why won't he answer
me? I'm totally losing it, I didn't even notice if his clothes are
still here or not, but he can't have gone, he didn't have time to - I wasn't
out of it that long, at least I don't think -
I'm so worried about him and
so relieved to see him my first impulse is to leap across the room and
hug the crap out him but it's stopped in its tracks, just like me, at the
sight of him.
He's buck naked, sitting cross-legged
on the floor in the darkness of the living room, all of the details of
the room swallowed in shadow except the most important one. Him.
There's a faint glimmer of moonlight bleeding in through the glass of the
door to the deck, just enough to barely dilute the darkness but when it
hits him, kisses all that white, receptive, smooth skin making it shine…
He's glowing dreamily, softly
gleaming in the darkness, surrounded by a pale halo of fairy light. Like
something surreal, a fey creature from another world. Magical, enchanting.
He's sure cast a spell over
me. And I'm not getting free of it any time soon. Not that
I'm complaining, or anything. Or putting up much of a fight.
He's holding something in his
lap, his head bent down over it. I can't make it out so I take a
"It didn't work," his voice
sighs out through the stillness, stopping me again.
"Daniel, I'm - I'm sorry," my
tongue is fumbling around the words, swelling and clumsy with the emotion
clogging my throat. "I didn't mean to hurt you - "
"Oh - oh no!" Daniel's
head snaps up and I can feel the honest, horrified concern in the eyes
devouring me. "Oh you didn't - not at all. Nothing like that,
Jack," he fervently assures me. "I - you - you didn't hurt me. I
- it was wonderful. You - you were wonderful."
Well, yeah, of course I was.
If I do say so myself.
"It just didn't work," he finishes
Okay, now I'm confused. So what
else is new?
I brush it off, kick my butt
down the stairs and I'm at his side in an instant, settling down beside
him, taking the picture from his hands.
That's what it is, one of the
photos from my mantle. The one of the four of us. Daniel left
our bed after possibly the hottest sex we've ever had and instead of being
cuddled up and comfortably comatose in my arms in that same bed he's out
here, in the dark, in his birthday suit, staring at a family photo.
His family - the only one he's
I reach out to him, put my hand
on his shoulder and he stiffens at my touch. Almost pulls away, not
quite, but so close. He says I didn't hurt him and he's never lied
to me but he's also never -
I'm scared again. Real
"Daniel, what's going on?"
He sighs heavily and slumps,
melting into my touch, into me, taking away the taste of fear in my mouth.
"I wanted to stop thinking,"
he murmurs. "Stop - " he frowns and hangs his head again. "Just
stop thinking. But it didn't work. I can't get her face out
of my mind. She's so sad and I feel so - I wish… I know how
I would feel - if it was me - if I lost - "
I know what's wrong and it kills
me he would still think - especially after what we just did - I'd want
anyone else, even her, instead of him, that's not the way it is, I have
to make him understand -
"I'm sorry, Jack," he mournfully
murmurs. "I made a mistake. I can see that now. I shouldn't
have - I'm in the way. Not me. It wasn't supposed to be me.
She loves you so much - "
Oh - woah! Wait a minute!
Back up! Me? Not me, pal! She loved a guy who might have
had my face but that's as far as it goes. Not me! Not no way, no
how. We've got nothing in common other than the fact we started out
our lives as Jack O'Neill but after that he went his way and I went mine
and I'm not him and - oh holy crap. Finally buying a clue here.
Take the last train to Schmucksville,
O'Neill, once again you missed the boat, not to mention the point.
Hello! Daniel doesn't think I'm settling for him because I can't
have Carter, he thinks I should be with Carter but I can't be.
Because I'm with him.
Of course he does, of course
he does. I've been so stupid - as usual - Daniel - it's the
way he is, what he is, the way he thinks, puts everyone else first - of
course he'd see it this way!
And what he's seeing is he's
selfishly seduced me from my right and destined path, and every moment
he stays with me he's keeping me from knowing true love.
to Yadda Main Page
"Jack," Daniel sighs, "Stop…hovering.
It's no big deal. I've climbed up here dozens of times before."
But never right after you've
barely crawled away from death's door.
I didn't say that out loud,
did I? Nope, definitely didn't. Damned near bit my tongue through
holding it inside, but I didn't.
"Ole Doc Fraiser will have my
head if she finds out I've let you come out here in the middle of the frigging
night," I gruffly scold Daniel as I follow him as closely as I dare while
he painfully struggles to negotiate the route to my roof. The state
his illness has left him in, I'm thinking Daniel wouldn't find Everest
as much of a challenge right now as the little ladder he's currently struggling
to pull himself up. But being who he is and the fact he's set his
mind to doing it - even though he can barely stand he'll haul his ass all
the way up to the roof on stubbornness alone. All on his own, thank
you very much. Colonels need not hover, scold or sweat it. And they'd
also better not try to stop him either.
Actually, the way he's clinging
to the rungs and gasping I'm surprised he has the energy to spare for bitching
- we're only halfway to the top and even he can't ignore the how much this
seemingly simple exertion is taking it out of him.
Still, it's just like him to
want to - to need to do something like this even though he's still so damned
weak he can barely make it to the john without a helping hand. Hell, he's
the only man living stubborner than I am. And that's saying something.
He's also no better at being a patient. Or lying back and doing what's
he's told for his own damned good. Especially if he gets a notion
in his head he wants to do something else - whether doing it is in his
own best interests or not.
Even though we both know he
should be in bed and he really doesn't have the strength yet to be climbing
onto roofs Daniel wants to see the stars. He wants to see the damned
stars and the best place for doing that is on my roof, so he's going to
make it up this frigging ladder so he can see the frigging stars on my
frigging roof, that's the long and the short of it.
Isn't this just like him, dammit!
Only a day and a half out of Fraiser's tender loving care after just barely
living through three weeks of a raging fever of alien origins that should
have killed him. Probably would have killed anyone else. Didn't kill
him, though, but it's left its mark on him just the same. It'll be
awhile before he's strong enough to even think of going back to work, never
mind anything else, and he's still so weak and physically wasted he definitely
shouldn't be out of bed never mind doing what he's doing right now.
But he is.
And here's me, so damned grateful
he's still alive I can't say no to him even though I know…well, you know…
So although I should have put my foot down and not let him get out of bed,
guess what, I didn't, so here he is, and here I am standing by with my
heart in my mouth as he struggles and sweats, not stopping him. What's
more it's tearing my heart out to see him like this - so damned weak and
yet so damned determined - knowing there's no way I can help him - because
there' no way he'd let me - make any of it any easier for him.
But you know what, as I hang
so close behind him I can almost feel each bead of sweat blossoming on
his shining skin I realise this same bone deep stubbornness, the very spirit
driving him to doggedly fight his way up to my roof against all the odds
and his own infirmity - this 'never say die, never surrender' Jackson grit
is what kept him alive all those weeks while the fever burned him alive
before our helpless eyes. The same thing giving him the strength
to haul himself up another rung is what kept him hanging on, day after
agonising, endless day even after even Fraiser was convinced he wouldn't
make it to each successive sunrise. But he showed her, all right.
He showed all of us. He hung in. He made it through. Thank God.
Daniel never gives up.
He'll make it to the roof, the same way he bucked the odds and beat that
alien bug trying to kill him.
to Yadda Main Page
"Doctor Jackson, you have not answered
Oh God, what's the matter with
me? What have I been thinking, letting myself zone off like this!
What were we talking about? Question? He asked me a question?
"Um - Your Grace - I - "
Stupid, Daniel, stupid! Out
to sea without a clue and the whole damned deal's on my stupid shoulders.
Way to go, doofus. That's what you get for indulging yourself in a wee
mental hissy fit on the SGC's time. Dammit, focus. Get past
the headache and your petty little ego issues and get back to work.
This really is important, Sam's right to be so excited, if this Jethrit
can do half of what she thinks it can and -
Important, this is important,
job to do, so come on, Daniel, let's do it - it's just…it's not easy…hard
to concentrate and stay on track the way my head…
"I think - that is - I'm - I'm
sorry, if I could ask for just - just a moment - "
Dammit, dammit, never mind about
the headache, pull yourself together Daniel, I can't blow this, this is
important, I have to hang on, as long as it takes to hammer out this treaty.
I can do this. I can. Muffah is playing little power
games with me, making this more complicated than it needs to be but I've
dealt with harder cases than him and come out on top. The Dah-nees of Asuwa
is strictly amateur hour compared to -
"You seem distressed, my dear
Doctor. Or is it Daniel? May I call you Daniel? Perhaps
you begin to trust me more, perhaps - ah! Colonel O'Neill!"
Oh God! What's wrong with
me? Head…hurts! Whoa, all of a sudden - don't feel so good.
What - what's going on -
"You'll forgive me for butting
in, Your Dahn-i-ness, I apologise if I'm treading on any diplomatic toes,
here, barging in on the two of you so hard at it and all, but I'm responsible
for Doctor Jackson's well being and making sure he gets his eight hours
so he can be bright eyed and bushy tailed at the negotiating table in the
morning, so if you'll forgive me, I'm putting an end to this party for
the day on account of it's way past Daniel's bed time and you've already
made him miss both his lunch and his dinner. Naughty, naughty!"
Jack! What are you - b-bed?
It's that late? Oh God, we've been here that long? Lost track of time,
again, I - I had no….no idea. Another day gone - wasted and I'm no
Jack will be furious with me.
Something weird's going on…I
feel strange, my entire body feels odd, numb - what's going on - Jack?
I can feel him…behind me…standing so close. That's - that's very
odd. After all this time…distance… why now so close…pressed, pressed
up against me -
Hands! Jack's hands on
my shoulders, clutching, squeezing hard. Such a shock to feel him
touch me; it slices through me, hurts - almost - the sensation is so unexpected,
it's been so long.
Touching me, Jack's touching
me. Must be the shock, that must be why I feel so strange, why I
feel like I'm turning into jelly and am about to slither out of the chair
and pool under the table. That has to be what's wrong with me. Has
to be but….
Okay, this is definitely getting
creepy. Muffah's fat, fuchsia form is dancing rather disconcertingly all
over my field of vision so I blink rapidly several times endeavouring to
Doesn't help. Blink some
more. Shake my head - and then wish I hadn't as the whole room goes
woooooooo Nellie and I'm going over too, look out floor, I'm on my way
Oh, maybe not. Jack's
still got me. Jack's hand; moving to firmly cup my upper arms and
hold - hold me in place. All the easier to yell at me, I guess, if I can't
run away. Not going anywhere. Not leaving the chair.
Hands like steel, holding…keeping…
Want to say - trying to talk
- can't seem to - make words - mouth won't - not working right -
"Colonel O'Neill, my most abject
apologies for completely monopolising Doctor Jackson."
Muffah's voice. Like molasses
coating my senses. Ick. Want to push through the confusion, focus
on what he's saying but keep getting drawn back to the feel of Jack's hands
holding, touching, gripping, not tender, not like I once foolishly hoped,
dreamt but still touching, so good after so long even if it doesn't mean….
Doesn't mean a damned thing,
Daniel, and it never will. Deal with it.
to Yadda Main Page
She knew she should leave but she couldn’t move.
Was completely unable to tear her eyes from the man she thought
she knew, who had suddenly become someone completely different. A man in love, a man in anguish, a man in the throes
of deep, dark terror for the one he would do anything for and now could do
nothing to help.
Daniel’s chest heaved, a deep, gasping sob escaping from him. His eyelids fluttered and then opened.
Oh God, he’s awake!
“Jack?” The ragged utterance was barely
audible, but the need in it was plain. The colonel
drew closer, moving so Daniel could see him. See
he was there.
“Shhh,” he whispered soothingly, trying to force his features into
the semblance of a reassuring smile. “Here, Danny,
Don’t try to talk.“
Daniel’s breathing became laboured as a wave of agony visibly sheered
through him; a large tear slipped from his eye and careened down the side
of his face.
“This – this really…really….sucks…” he groaned, screwing his eyes
shut again as if grimacing could repel the pain assaulting him. His undamaged hand beat weakly against the colonel’s
chest, trying and failing to hook his fingers into the colonel’s shirt as
he struggled for an anchor against the seas of pain he was drowning in.
The colonel’s hand closed swiftly over the one reaching out to him;
he captured it firmly and crushed it fiercely to his chest.
“I know, love, I know, I know,” the colonel crooned, his voice gentle
“Sucks,” Daniel affirmed stubbornly.
“I’m here, Danny. It’ll be all right.”
“P-promise?” The word rode out of Daniel’s
throat on a choking gulp of pain.
“Youbetcha,” the colonel whispered as he leaned closer, brushing
his lips softly against Daniel’s forehead, his eyes so terribly tender it
hurt to see them. He continued to lightly, lovingly
kiss Daniel’s brow and gently massage the hand tightly clenched in his.
“You’re just saying that,” Daniel started to grin and failed, his
brave attempt at levity aborted by yet another assault of agony.
“God!” he cried, trying to suppress the sob crowding his throat. “Jack!”
Sam felt her own throat close with choking sorrow as she saw the
colonel momentarily squeeze his eyes shut against the wrenching sounds Daniel
was making and then open them again, his face resolutely brave for the sake
of the man looking to him for the strength to continue.
it,” he said gently but firmly. “Hey, have I
ever lied to you?”
back to story info
back to Yadda Main Page
"This damned tower had better be worth the effort,
that's all I'm saying," Jack grumbled and glared at the top of the hill
SG-1 was climbing toward. "Why do aliens always
have to build these oh so damned fascinating we just have to check them
out buildings on top of huge, honking hills anyway? Frigging inconsiderate. And why is it exactly we find this particular structure
so damned fascinating again?"
"That's where the energy readings are coming
from, Sir," Carter said, tossing a grin at Daniel as he trudged silently
beside her, a fondly exasperated smile pulling at his mouth at the latest
complaint offered by the constantly carping man behind them.
"It would also seem this tower is the only structure
within the area scanned by the UAV to have escaped the almost total destruction
of the other urban centres on this world," Teal'c patiently explained as
his powerful strides briskly and seemingly effortlessly devoured the difficult
ground beneath them and consequently set a pace at least one of his team
mates was having personal and not so silent issues with.
"That would seem to indicate the structure enjoyed some sort of protection
the cities did not and that, as well as its unique position so close to the
gate makes it worthy of investigation."
"Definitely worth checking out in my book, Sir,"
Carter added. "The tower is extremely conspicuous,
it even seems to be sending out a regular signal almost like a lighthouse
beacon which would certainly have drawn attention to it and yet it's completely
unharmed while the cities themselves – well, the Goa'uld didn't leave much
standing, did they?"
"Or anyone around to tell us exactly what happened
here and save us a trip," Jack grunted. "Whatever
went down here – something really pissed the Goa'uld off.
They're not usually quite so hard on the real estate."
Teal'c rumbled. "The degree of destruction we
have witnessed on this world is most unusual. As
a rule he Goa'uld do not destroy structures constructed by advanced cultures
such as this one must have been. After they
have subjugated the population and secured the technology it is customary
for them to assimilate and adapt the residents and their cities to their
own uses." The Jaffa passed and took several
strides forward before continuing. "Perhaps
the planet was razed as a retaliatory measure."
"Against who? For what?" Jack asked.
"I've been thinking about that," Daniel tossed
back over his shoulder to Jack. "Obviously there
were people here once, and now, there aren't. The
natural assumption is of course, the Goa'uld took them all away but I wonder. I mean, like Teal'c said, if the Goa'uld conquered
this planet and relocated the population than why destroy the cities? I mean, obviously they could, because they did, but
since they could they didn't need to. I
agree with Teal'c the Goa'uld don't usually destroy stuff they can use. It doesn't make sense."
"Why invent the wheel when you can steal someone
else's?" Jack quipped.
"Yeah," Daniel nodded.
"So what happened here? There's definitely
more going on than meets the eye something that set the Goa'uld off,
but I have no idea what that could be. But there was something. Such deliberate, wholesale, systematic destruction,
not only is it unusually extravagant but it's just not their style. Like Teal'c says, they're scavengers and opportunists,
not – "
they didn't find what they were looking for," Jack said with a shrug.
back to story info
back to Yadda
Goddamn rat bastards,
as soon as I get my hands free every single one of these dirt bags is going
to be sorry they were ever born. Starting with
El Scummo over there, the one with the big mouth and the even fatter lip. Courtesy of yours truly. At least I managed to get
one good punch in before Shithead and company took me out.
I can’t believe I let
those losers land me. Crap, I have to be slipping
in my old age - got water on the brain or something. I don’t care if there were five of them, there’s
no way these freakin’ amateurs should have got the drop on me. If I’d been paying attention, thinking with my brain
instead of my….
Yeah, gowan, say it,
Jack. Your dick, flyboy. You left your brains in your shorts again. Instead of keeping my mind on business where it should
have been it was happily fixated on Daniel’s ass where it definitely had
no business being. Even if I wasn’t working. Which
I was. I was ogling my archaeologist when
I should have been watching the room. Keeping
an eye on the players, looking for the signs I should have seen and would
have if I’d been looking – there were some Mallik scum buckets crashing
the party with intentions of making off with one of the guests of honour.
Which they did. Oh lucky me.
Dammit, I can’t believe
I let myself get that complacent. This is frigging
embarrassing. I’ve been doing this how long? Happy, laughing, smiling people – all of that can
mean squat in a split second if someone inadvertently puts their foot in
it or spits in the wrong dish or whatthefuckever. There
are no guarantees in this crazy business. I
should know that by now. Do know that. Yet, I let myself get caught with my pants down. Metaphorically speaking. No
excuse, Jack, no excuse whatsoever. You get
sloppy, you get stupid, you get shit like this happening to you. I guess I should consider myself lucky they settled
for dropping a sack over my head and beating the crap out of me and didn’t
kill me in the bargain. Now that would have been
I should get a big whack
across the head for this one. Over and above the ones I’ve already gotten,
that is. Yeah, I damn well should. I should have been paying attention. Shouldn’t have let the happy smiles and the free
booze and Daniel’s ass - God, that ass… But I let our success – Daniel’s success - go to my head, let – let wanting Daniel make me horny
Dammit, I’ve got to
do something about Daniel, either shit or get off the pot – get my head examined,
get the hell out of Dodge before I really screw up – something. The next time I get sucked into the libidinous
zone on company time someone could get killed.
Starting with me.
Actually, in this particular
instance I’m probably being a tad melodramatic. About
the getting killed part, that is. Yeah, sure, it doesn’t look great, lured
out, bonked on the head, trussed up like a frigging Christmas turkey, thrown
on the back of a horse, taken for a wee joy ride and then tossed on this
lovely cold, hard ground still hog-tied while these dingdongs run around
and try to find their asses or something but other than expiring from embarrassment
I don’t think I’m in any danger of having anything more serious happening
to me in my immediate future than more horse bouncing once these guys get
it together and we start heading off again to wherever it is we’re supposed
to be heading off to. The chief rat boy over
there might be slightly ticked off at me because I busted his nose but from
what I've overheard – they need me alive. They
think they’re gonna use me to force the SGC to play footsie with their side
and help them win this little war they’ve got going with our hosts and new
allies – a war said new allies interestingly enough completely forgot to
tell us about, mind you – so while the Dirt Bag gang here might rough
me up a bit before they deliver me to their bosses they’re not actually allowed
to do anything to me too permanent, damaging, disfiguring or fatal.
it’s nice to be wanted, isn’t it?
back to story info
back to Yadda Main Page
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was last updated 01 Jan 10